The most common question I hear from almost every client who comes to me is this. They think I will be helping them look for a new job, and how to get their dream job. I always wish I had a magic wand. Alas, I am just a coach, and very human.
They expect me to show them a new way of doing things, hand them a plan, and tell them what to do next. That is not what a leadership coach does.
My job as a coach is to let you uncover your own truths, and let you feel what is right for you. Not what worked for me. Not what worked for someone else. What is true for you.
I always tell clients who come to me for career coaching, I will not find a job for you. But I will help you find your tools, your confidence, to look for a better job. And along the way I will share my own experience of finding jobs when I least expected to, like landing a role just before turning 50, when I had convinced myself no one would hire me at that age. Or continuing to work right through cancer at 52, when I thought my career was over.
I share this because I have sat where they sit, believing it was too late for me. It was not.
So since this myth comes up so often, let me clear up the rest of them too. Here is what coaching is not, and what it actually is.
Coaching is not providing quick answers. I do not hand you answers. I ask the questions that help you find your own. An answer you found yourself stays with you. Advice rarely does.
Coaching is not therapy. Therapy looks at your past to understand why you are the way you are. Coaching starts from where you are now and works forward. Both help. They just do different jobs.
Coaching is not mentoring. A mentor tells you what worked for them, hoping it works for you too. A coach helps you do the inner work yourself, by asking the right questions.
Coaching is not consulting. A consultant looks at your business and tells you what to fix. A coach sits with you, the person running the business, and helps you think clearly.
Coaching is not a quick fix. Real change does not happen in one conversation. It happens slowly, session by session, as you start seeing yourself differently and doing the work on yourself.
Coaching is not for broken people. The leaders who come to me are capable, accomplished, doing everything right on paper. They do not need fixing. They need a space to hear themselves think, and in that thinking, they thrive.
Coaching is not just expensive talking. A friend wants you happy, so they take your side. A coach has no side. A coach only wants you to see yourself clearly, and does that by holding up a mirror.
Your coach does not need to know your industry. Coaching works on the person, not the industry. Pressure feels the same everywhere. What matters is that your coach understands people, and the pressure you feel.
Coaching is not only for a crisis. You do not have to wait until something breaks. Some of the best coaching happens when things are already going well and you want to grow beyond your current limits.
And needing a coach does not mean you have failed. The best athletes in the world have coaches. Not because they failed. Because they want to get better.
So what does a coach actually do?
In my sessions, I actually listen to my clients. I help them hear themselves, so they know what makes them unique. I let them uncover their truth and win back their own confidence.
I am a sounding board for my clients, and their biggest cheerleader. That is really what a coach does.
If any of these myths have been holding you back, I understand. I believed some of them myself once. And if you are ready to hear yourself think again, come and talk to me. That is what I am here for.
With love,
Usha Nagrani Executive Leadership Coach | Leading Well When It Matters Most
Usha Nagrani, an HR Leader turned ICF Executive Coach, empowers senior management professionals and business leaders to achieve breakthroughs as expats, build cross-cultural teams, and navigate the exciting journey of career acceleration.
